Cat's Mid-Vacation Check-In

So I've not posted in a few days. Been too busy enjoying the beach and the weather! Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday were mega-beach days. 4+ hours in the sand. Braedon has mastered the boogie board and we have to drag him out of the water to eat lunch. Ells is all about making friends of all ages on the beach. She flutters around and by the end of the day she knows everyone within a 50 ft. radius by name. Evening entertainment has included a mini-date night for Chris and me on Monday, the Ocean City Maryland Boardwalk Tuesday and some Mexican food on the beach at Que Pasa in Dewey Beach.

Monday, I got in about 30 minutes on the treadmill at the gym. Tuesday morning I ran outside just over 3 miles. It was much cooler and I didn't feel like I was going to throw up from the heat - always a bonus. Today, I decided to take a break - no workout.

My food intake hasn't been disastrous, but it hasn't been great either. Breakfast and lunch each day have been pretty much the same, Fiber One cereal with almond milk, and a half of a cold cut sandwich with some pretzels and maybe a protein bar. Monday night dinner was some chicken and pork barbecue with some evilly delicious corn bread. I may have had a martini or 2 on my mini-date. I also may have taken the kid's to a candy store late night. There were chocolate covered Oreos & pretzels and a truffle or 2. Tuesday was boardwalk pizza with an ice cream cone. Tonight I ate way too much guacamole, and we went to Candy Kitchen, Kohr Brothers AND Dolle's. Need I say more?

I am going to try and count calories a little better the remaining days of my vacation, but I'm not making any promises. Here's the deal - my clothes still fit, I don't look terrible in my bikini, and I'm having a great time with my family. Besides, if your chocolate has fruit inside of it, that's healthy - right?

My new mantra: I love my kids, I love my kids, I love my kids!

I do love my kids, but man, are they annoying. I know that are excited to be on vacation, and they are just wound up about going to the pool and the beach. Chris and I have threatened to drive them back home about 50 times today if they don't start listening to us. We both really need to take a deep breath and be more patient with them. Vacations like these are just a reminder that once you have kids, you are totally living for them, and selfishness is not an option. Neither is a quiet dip in the pool or a quick dip in the ocean.We spent about an hour at the pool this morning, had lunch and headed to the beach around noon. A pretty wicked thunderstorm closed the beach around 2:30 and the open-trolly ride home in the downpour made for some comic relief. This is what we do at the beach when it rains:

The kids got some more time in the sand after dinner wading in the water and watching some older kids wake boarding.

I give the day about a 7 overall.

I managed to run outside this morning around 8am. But man, was it hot! I'm used to running in my basement where it's nice and cool, even when it's 100+ outside. I lasted about 2 miles in the actual heat and humidity before I felt like I was going to puke, and had to walk the last mile back to the condo. I also did some ab work this evening - was inpsired by my women's health magazine - perfect beach reading!

Breakfast - 1 egg with a laughing cow cheese wedge, some fiber One raisin bran crunch and almond milk and some blueberries (350 calories)

Lunch - pretzel chips and another cheese wedge and a protein bar (350 calories)

Snacks - 2 Keebler Fudge stripe cookies. (115 calories)

Dinner - 3 steamed blue crabs, 3 hush puppies, a handful of kettle chips and a Kohr Bros. custard. (about 800 calories)

So I'm pretty sure I went over my calories for the day, but I didn't totally blow it. I don't feel deprived and I got some exercise, so I'm not going to beat myself up about it. Still not relaxing all that much - have to work on that. So here's to a better day tomorrow. More beach-time, less rain, less whining and fewer Mommy-threats. Amen.

Destination Relaxation

We piled linens for 3 beds, 4 pillows, clothes for 4 for a week, bathing suits, beach chairs, various sundries, beach towels, bath towels, sunscreen, goggles, computers, phones chargers, camera, 4 humans and 2 dogs into my Pilot around 1pm today. Luckily the dogs only had a short trip to their daycare. The 4 humans suffered through close to 4 hours in the car before we got to the house. The AC was off, and I guess I expected it to be, but it was 90 degrees in the place. So we dumped our stuff, and headed out for dinner and groceries hoping the condo would cool off by the time we got home. Luckily it did! So the kids haven't gotten to swim or go to the beach, or even see a boardwalk yet, but we have 6 more days. We have plans to meet up with a whole bunch of friends old and new, and the community we're staying in offers a ton of activities, along with a fitness center with classes galore. So I have no excuses . . . I did workout this morning, did 20 minutes of interval training, and 20 minutes walking on an incline. Burned about 500 calories and got caught up on NY ink.

Breakfast: 2 full eggs and 2 egg whites scrambled with some laughing cow cheese. I also had a protein bar (400 calories)

Lunch: Wawa Buffalo Blue Chicken Wrap and half of a Take 5 bar (500 calories) Best thing I could find on the road that would fill me up and taste good.

Dinner: Apple Martini - some fried calamari and a few scallops, shrimp, mussels and clams (500 calories)

Dessert: Rita's custard (200 calories)

So today wasn't perfect, and I'm on vacation, so I don't expect it to be. My goal for the next 6 days is to RELAX, get some exercise, and enjoy time with my family and friends. There is no scale here, so I will have to wait until next Saturday to weigh in. That's probably a good thing - for now.

PS. Don't tell work that I have Wifi here at the beach!!!

So much for a day off

So I was supposed to take a vacation day to prepare for our week at the beach. I ended up working most of the day. Luckily, I got a lot accomplished in a short amount of time and I feel even better about being incommunicado with work for 9 full days starting tomorrow.

Food and exercise-wise, today was a good day. I woke up weighing 139 lbs. I finished 45 minutes on the treadmill, this time with an incline - about 500 calories. Watched the season finale of Housewives of NYC. Always adequate entertainment for a home workout.

Breakfast - Supreme Protein protein bar - 200 calories

Lunch - Tuna salad and pretzel chips; 4 strawberries - 400 calories

Dinner - Green apple martini and crab/basil ravioli - ?? Calories. Probably 800.

I was so busy running errands and working, that I didn't get a chance to have any snacks. Probably a good thing since dinner was an unexpected treat. I could probably have dessert, but I'm not going to press my luck. I'm done for the day.

Another pair of flip flops came in the mail today for Ells. They are still on her feet. Let's hope they make it back into her closed closet and not in Dash's mouth.

Stressed out: Vacation pending

Super busy and at work today. Provided a nice distraction from food. There were even brownies in the kitchen leftover from some partner visit that I managed to resist. I was able to get through 45 minutes of cardio. Watched Million Dollar Decorators and part of Flippin' Out. What would I do without the Bravo network? I know Andy Cohen and I would be friends - if he knew me.

Food Diary:

Breakfast Cheerios with skim milk and a granny smith apple

am snack Greek Yogurt

Lunch Steamed veggies - mushrooms, broccoli and squash with a

tuna salad sandwich on light whole wheat bread.

pm snack Pretzels and cheese, popcorn, baby carrots and some

strawberries

dinner protein bar, some more tuna salad with some pretzel chips.

According to my fitness pal If everyday were like today, I'd weigh 134.5 in 5 weeks. Sounds good to me. I burned 475 calories and ate about 1500. I weighed 139.5 this morning.

I've been pretty stressed with work - lots to do before I take vacation. I have been staying late in the office and working from home in the evenings. Tonight will be no different. I hope I can actually take tomorrow off as planned. Wish me luck.

5 pairs of flip flops - I'm grumpy and hungry

We have a new puppy. He's about 7 months old and loves to eat flip flops. The first pair he destroyed were mine. Since then we are diligent about keeping our shoes out of harm's way and keeping an eye out for any misplaced flip flops that might fall prey to our little Dash. My kids have serious trouble paying attention to where they leave their shoes and more trouble paying attention when the puppy is chewing on something he shouldn't be RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM.

We leave for a beach vacation on Saturday, and my daughter still doesn't have a pair of flip flops, despite that fact that I have purchased her 3 pairs in the last month. Each time she gets a new pair they get worn for the day, she takes them off in the kitchen and leaves them on the bench - where the dog can reach them, and about an hour later, I find them in his mouth, destroyed. The latest pair succumbed the most quickly. I think she owned them for less than 24 hours. Wore them to camp, came home, left them on the bench and when I called home around dinner time to tell everyone I was still working, she announced, almost with a chuckle that Dash got her flip flops. Are you freaking kidding me? I'll but her next pair at the beach, at least the dog won't be around to destroy them and they'll have a chance at lasting for at least a week.

So how did I do today? I'm tired, stressed out at work, annoyed at the dog and my kids. Good thing I work out in the morning! I did another 60 minutes on the treadmill and did some free weights just before 6am.

Here's what I ate: This may have been worse if I hadn't left my purse at home today. No money to cheat! Another good strategy!

8am Diet Coke

9am Supreme Protein PB&J bar 200 calories

11am Pretzels with cheese 145 calories

1pm Turkey Chili 250 calories

2pm strawberries 50 calories

2:45 Popcorn 100 calories

3:30 1/2 protein bar 200 calories

6:30 blueberries 80 calories

7pm Pretzel chips with tuna salad 275 calories

According to myfitnesspal:

If every day were like today... You'd weigh 132.6 lbs in 5 weeks

Today, I weighed 140.5 I probably should be eating a bit more- but I'm afraid if I eat anything else, it may snowball into something bad - so I'm going to stop here.

Anyone with tips for preventing Dash from eating any more shoes, aside from sending him back to the pound - let me know.

My Grandmother and dragonflies

My Dad's Mother, my Mom-mom Schiavelli, or Mom-mom "spaghetti" as my children referred to her before they could pronounce Schiavelli, died on July 3rd. She had been hospitalized the week before and luckily, I was able to spend a great deal of time with her the few days before her death. She was 87 years old, a traditional italian wife and mother who doted on and cared for her husband up until his death 3 years ago. She was a breast cancer survivor. She was a marvelous cook, a really good scrabble player and I have so many wonderful memories of her that I hold close to my heart. We had gotten much closer since the death of my grandfather. My grandmother spent most, if not all of her energy caring for him especially during the last several years of his life. I remember after he died thinking 1 of 2 things may happen. She would bounce back and enjoy her time to do the things she couldn't do before, or she would fall into some kind of funk and live out the rest of her life sad and depressed. When I found out that she was headed to Wildwood with a friend of hers a week or so after the funeral - I knew she was going to be OK.

She was diagnosed with lung cancer last summer and although she was not going through aggressive treatment, she was able to remain comfortable and relatively healthy for several months before feeling sick and eventually succumbing to this crappy disease. I will say - she lived her life pretty much the way she wanted to and she was loved by everyone who encountered her and was lucky enough to have her in their life.

I could go on and on, but I will share just some of my favorite memories both old and new:

1. Her fingernails. They were thick and well manicured. When she told stories at the dining room table, I would notice her hands folding a napkin or smoothing out the tablecloth.



2. Her jewelry - mostly costume that she kept in her dresser and would let me peruse and try on anytime I wanted.



3. Raiding her pantry closet in Pleasant Hills for chewing gum and candy. Pop-pop loved chocolate, Mom-mom loved her Wrigley's and there was always ample amounts of both for the taking.



4. Watching her play Ant Smasher on my smart phone. This kept her entertained while in the hospital this past winter.



5. Hearing her say "you're so cute!" to both of my kids while giving them her Mom-mom hugs.



6. The look on her face when she would see my daughter. I am so glad I brought Ells to see her in the hospital just a few days before she died. It was a great, happy visit!



7. Bringing her GeneralTso's chicken - one of her favs!



8. Her love for rice pudding and Vanilla milkshakes



9. Recently sharing all my photos and videos of the kids with her on my Mac and watching her reaction to seeing many pictures she had never seen before.



10. Dancing in the livingroom in Pleasant Hills at Christmas time.



11. Playing bingo and Rummy tiles with her and my kids.

I was a mess at her funeral. I couldn't stop crying. Everytime I saw her laid out in her coffin, or when I saw friends and relatives giving their condolences to my Dad or my Aunts, I cried. I still cry. I miss her very much and even though I spent as much time with her as a could over the years, I wish I had spent more time with her. She was the best story teller - and I could sit and listen to her for hours upon hours talking about the "olden days". She was beautiful inside and out. I hope to have inherited some of her youthful genes, but most of all I hope I have the love and kindness in my heart that she possessed.

A week ago at our pool there I noticed a very large, very beautiful dragonfly just hanging around. The other night we went to a Blue Rocks game, and a dragonfly would not leave us alone. High speed fly-bys, and even landed on my husband's head. I drive by my grandmother's cemetary every day to and from work. It's only open from 8:30-4 each day, so it's normally closed when I'm passing by. Yesterday morning I was running late and noticed the gate was open as I stopped at a red light. I thought about popping in for a visit, but realized I probably should just head to work. The moment the light turned green, a dragonfly landed on the hood of my car, and it flitted around the car for about 2 blocks as I drove away.

I googled it this morning and found the following:

Dragonflies are messengers of the elemental world. Some cultures believe they are symbols for renewal, change, maturity, and depth of character. Now I've never been really into the elemental world, but I'm taking all this in and can't help but wonder if someone's trying to tell me something.

I'm keeping my eyes, ears and heart open. I'm am missing my Mom-mom and hoping she has more to tell me in the years to come. I'm also thinking I may need another tattoo . .

Day 1 of My Public Food Diary

So - this is the first of many daily updates I plan to post outlining my daily food and exercise activities. Today started off with a bang - 60+ minutes on the treadmill at 6am. Burned about 600 calories while watching the Bachelorette on my DVR. I weighed 140.

Food intake - well that's another story. Despite the fact that the summary from myfitnesspal.com states "if every day were like today . . . you'd weigh 134.5 in 5 weeks", my food choices leave a little to be desired. I started off pretty well - 1/2 a protein bar and a couple of eggs for breakfast. Turkey chili for lunch. I also drank close to 40 oz of diet coke before 1pm. I should probably ditch the soda for more water. Not today. For a snack I had some honey wheat pretzels and laughing cow swiss cheese - a very satisfying snack for about 150 calories. Another snack of baby carrots and some microwave popcorn - another 150 calories.

I should also mention that I'm taking bee pollen supplements. 2 capsules 3x a day. The first 2 I took this am felt like they were stuck in my throat all morning. Anyway - up until 4pm today, I had consumed about 800 calories. With the exercise I did, I had about 600 more to go for the day. I had plans to eat some leftover pork ribs (300 calories) and maybe another protein bar and some fruit. The best laid plans . . .

At 4pm I had a meeting, and the red velvet cheesecake was there. It was a celebration of sorts. I decided to just share a piece with my friend. I ended up eating 3/4 of that piece and another sliver just for myself. So that became my dinner & dessert. All consumed before 5pm. I'm not too disappointed. Luckily the cheesecake was filling, so I'm not really hungry and it didn't send me into some feeding frenzy - always a good thing! I'm sure I won't eat anything else today. But some meat and fruit would have obviously been a better choice. There's always tomorrow!

I will say that the prospect of sharing everything I ate today definitely came into play when faced with food choices. I bet if I wasn't doing this - I would have snuck in another piece or 2 of cake, and I would have most likely eaten dinner as well. Here's to small victories and to better choices tomorrow.

And right on cue, my DH opens up a bag of Tostitos and salsa. Dear Lord, let me be strong.

My Food Addiction

The first step is admitting you have a problem - right? Ok. I am absolutely, positively convinced that I have some kind of food addiction. I have foods that trigger uncontrollable eating - primarily chocolate. I pretty much think about food all the time. And if there is "forbidden" food around, I can't stop thinking about it.

Here are a few ways I'm working around this addiction.

At work, we have a community fridge/freezer. Someone stocked it with several boxes of fudge bars and chocolate ice cream bars leftover from an event. This happened once before about 3 months ago, and no kidding, I must have eaten 2, 3 sometimes 4 of those bars each day, before they were all gone. So when the email came out this time notifying everyone of the treats, I quickly replied to all and pledged to pay $50 to anyone who caught me eating an ice cream bar. So far it's working, but there are still a few boxes left - I'm trying to be strong.

Tonight after dinner, I was hungry and craving something bad. The kids were eating Swedish Fish. I could have eaten a few handfuls. Instead, I decided to take my little one to Justice for a little retail therapy. I didn't have anything else to eat - yeah me - but I spent $70 on crap she didn't need.

While at Costco yesterday, I noticed they had my favorite 800-lb gorilla chocolate chip ice cream sandwiches. I normally would buy them, have one instead of a real meal, and some nights when everyone was asleep I'd have 1 or 2 just because they are so good. This time, I walked halfway back to my cart, turned around and put them back in the display case. If I don't buy them, I can't eat them.

The other morning while out at breakfast, my DH ordered his weekly cinnamon bun as an appetizer that we usually all share. I resisted even a small bite, knowing that would set me off on a bad binge that might have lasted the whole weekend. I told my husband that ordering that is like doing shots in front of an alcoholic. I think he thinks I may be too dramatic, but I think I'm on to something.

I'm convinced that if I wasn't working out - practically 7 days a week for an hour + each day - I would be morbidly obese. Easily. I don't want to workout to eat anymore. I want to workout and eat right and get smaller. So here's what I'm gonna do. I'm going to use this blog as a food/exercise/body diary for the next 30 days. Each day, I will post what I eat, how many calories I'm ingesting and how I'm feeling about what I'm eating (or not eating!). I will detail my daily workouts and even document my weight and some measurements.

Right now it's Monday night - I weigh 140.5 lbs. I walked/jogged 60 minutes this morning on the treadmill. Burned about 600 calories and ate about 1200 calories. I'll get more detailed on the food tomorrow. I'm too tired to go back and try to remember it all :)

PS. I'm hungry, but I'm afraid to eat anything.