You Can't Outrun Your Fork

I've been SO dedicated to exercise for the last 4 months, it's almost hard to believe.  I have been going to my CrossFit gym religiously 4-6x per week and working my ass off.  Not literally.  Ironically so, my ass is a little bit bigger than when I started if that's possible. But it's actually muscular, not flabby.  So much so that most of my jeans don't fit anymore.  They are loose in the waist (score!) and tight in the butt and thigh (those darn muscles again!)  I have made jean shopping a bit of a sport now. My mission? Find the perfect jean to fit a CrossFitter's body.  That's right - I'm a CrossFitter. Anyway, I'm getting way off track.  This post is about eating.

While I have been annoying most my Facebook friends with inspirational quotes with each CrossFit check-in, it helped to keep me accountable at first.  Although now, I'm fairly certain that I would be going to the gym as much even if I didn't "check-in",  I do get the occasional - "I love that quote" or "I was motivated to go the the gym when I read your post".  I can't describe how incredible it feels to know that something like that gave someone else the motivation they needed to do something.  It's crazy.  So sorry folks, since MY Facebook is all about ME - I'm not letting up on my almost daily check-ins.  I do, however need to figure out a way to keep me accountable for what I eat.

Food is such a struggle for me.  Growing up with 20-30 hours a week of ballet most of my childhood and adolescence, allowed me to eat pretty much whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.  Because of that, I have developed a serious love of food.  I'm sure there's some psychology behind what, when and why I eat.  I should probably take the time to explore that a little bit - but it's doubtful that I will.  So in the meantime I have to come up with a strategy that will assist me in keeping my cravings and binges in check.  I have tried using apps on my phone that work to a certain extent, but like a true addict, I oftentimes just omit certain things I eat (hide), so that I'm just fooling myself. It's kind of ridiculous.  I have tried pills and potions that just make my heart race and I know aren't good for me.  I have tried too many "diets" to count.  But lately, I've just been sticking to the 80/20 rule where I try to eat sensibly most of the time and allow myself the ability to indulge from time to time.  The problem is that most weeks it turns out to be more like 50/50.  Especially over the holidays when cookies and sweets (some of my all-time favorites) are all over the place.

My husband keeps reminding me of Body for Life that I did a hundred years ago with good success.  6 small meals - basically it's calorie control - which really is every diet.  I'm just having a hard time.  I think part of my problem is that I know I can afford to slip a little more than normal because I am working so hard at the gym.  But I don't tend to just slip.  I start by slipping and end up wallowing in dozens of cookies, or whole pints of ice cream.  While I'd like to reverse that mentality into something like "wow - you're doing all this great work, how about complementing it with clean eating and just imagine the gains you would make?"  Not sure why the combination of diet and exercise is so difficult for me.

So this is an open call for some suggestions.  I'm not looking for diet plans, or shakes or supplements.  I know exactly what I need to eat and what I need to stay away from to get me there. My goal is to lose 10-15 pounds of body fat.  Yes - I have that much to lose.  Yes - I know muscle weighs more than fat.  Yes I could be 15 pounds lighter and still have the muscle I have now.  No - I wouldn't be like 0% body fat (I would be much, much more).  Did I mention I'm a Vegan?  100% of the time minus when I'm eating ice cream or cookies.

I'm looking for strategies to help me do what I need to do.  I remember a few years ago there were cases of fudge bars in the office.  I swiftly sent out a mass email proclaiming I would pay anyone $50 who caught me eating a fudge bar.  Yes - there were times when I considered smuggling one into the bathroom and eating it, but i didn't.  Come to think of it - I should have accused whoever put those fudge bars in the freezer of harassment.  What's the statute of limitations on caloric harassment?

Burpees and Box Jumps and Squats, Oh my!

Mary and I have been walking/running about 4-5 days a week at 5am.  We started in August of 2012 and soldiered through the freezing cold winter and back through Spring and Summer.  I am not a runner – never have been.  But over the course of the year, I managed to get up to about 5 miles without stopping.  This was huge for me!  But it wasn’t enough.  Sure I could run, but my body was not really where I wanted it to be.   Mary and I had drinks with an old friend who told us about Crossfit.  We hadn’t seen her in several years and while she always had a thin build, we noticed that she was lean, tight and strong.  She started back in May and raved about the classes.  We both decided our “workouts” were getting pretty boring and we weren’t really seeing any significant results. 

So we agreed to give it a try.  We started August 26^th at 5am.  Why 5am?   That’s the only time during the day where I’m not working and anyone that needs me is still sleeping.   I recommend a time like that for everyone.  Makes excuses nearly impossible.  So our already lean, tight and strong friend met us there for our first workout.  She usually goes later in the day, but got up early to help shepherd us into this crazy, mystifying workout culture.   The WOD or “workout of the day” was thoughtfully written on a whiteboard in the front of the room.  The room, lovingly called “the box”,  is basically some warehouse space with gym equipment lining the 4 walls.  Lots of weight bars, kettle bells, medicine balls, jump ropes and bars to hang from.  While I don’t recall the exact WOD for my first day, it most likely consisted of some running, weight lifting and core work - all in about 45 minutes, with some optional floor work (core exercises) after that.  I was pretty much hooked from the beginning.  The time in class flew by and I didn’t feel intimidated by what others could do, or how fast or strong they were.  I knew I would improve each day. 

The box is my new sanctuary.  The coaches are fantastic and the people seem really nice.  The vibe seems a bit more mellow than some other local Crossfit gyms I’ve only heard about where competition seems paramount.  I love a good competition, but for right now, I’m just trying to get through these workouts, learn the proper form for some of these moves, and not throw up during class.  But don’t get me wrong – many of these people are fierce!  And I’m certain if they do compete, they do very well.  But I like that the coaches tailor their approach to what your goals are.  Like today, all I wanted to do was get through the workout.  No one was shouting at me with a stop watch telling me to hurry up.  All I got was encouragement from the coach, and others participating in the workout. 

So you’re probably wondering since I’ve been doing this for about a month now, how much weight have I lost.  Well, that’s the one thing about these workouts, and any strength training workouts that are worth a damn.  I’m not losing weight on the scale - YET.  I’m sure I could use some help with my diet, but being a vegan and working this hard has proven difficult.  But my body is totally changing.  I can see it already.  My first goal is to reduce the extra flab I’ve got between the armpit and my bra line a.k.a. bra fat.    I know once I get my diet squared away, some of the weight will start to come off.  I’m not seeing this as a temporary fix, I really do see myself doing this long term.  I’m up to 6 classes a week now, been doing that for about 2 weeks, and I plan to continue.  I can tell that I’m stronger already.  Adding weights to moves where just a few weeks ago, all I could lift was an empty bar.  This was just what I needed to get me to that next level of fitness.  And really, at my age – it’s more about health and less about a bikini bod.   The good news is, I know if I keep this up – the bikini bod will follow!  

I encourage my local friends to give it a try.  The first class is free, you can join for your first month for just $99 and that gives you unlimited number of classes per week.  Visit  www.crossfitkennettsquare.com for more details.   

Break out the Advil and join me – you won’t regret it! 

Vegan Slippage

Yikes – I went “Vegan” over 15 months ago.  No animal products.  No cheese, eggs, meat, milk.  Lost about 8 pounds in the first 3 months.  Kept it off for another 6 months.  All my health markers improved (Cholesterol, glucose, etc.)  Then I started eating fish and some dairy.  Then Thanksgiving and Christmas came.  Then I realized that French fries and bean burritos are vegan! Then cheer season arrived.  Weekend travel, budget hotels, and vendor food makes it impossible to eat healthy, let alone vegan.   All of a sudden I gained back the 8 and another 4.  I’m only 5’2” people.  That’s like 2 dress sizes.  My closet can’t handle all that.  Neither can my wallet.  Mind you, I’ve been walking/jogging 3-4x a week religiously since September.  I can only imagine what I would weigh if I hadn’t been exercising.

 

So here I am in the month of June switching gears yet again.  (I must have burned out a clutch or 2 by now)  Back to vegan.  Fruits, vegetables, beans, nuts and seeds.  I’ve been following this for about a week.  Aside from some birthday cake (for my daughter) and some sushi, I have not detoured.  I am not hungry, have no cravings, and am losing weight.  I’m only 7 pounds away from my lowest of 2012.  I’m still jogging/walking and I’m trying to fit in some weight training now that regular baseball season is over and cheer is slightly abbreviated this summer.  I had been previously swayed by the shakes and pills, but I firmly believe that real, whole foods are the best foods and I’m staying away from processed anything.  I’m feeling a little tired, probably because I’m off of my daily caffeine.  But no headaches and I’m sleeping really well.

 

I’m so glad that some of my favorite fruits are in season.   I hit Costco for mangos and peaches.  My breakfast secret is a cherry/banana drink.   I take 1 fresh banana and about 6 cherries and freeze them overnight.  Then add them to the blender with almond milk and some flax seed.  Watch out with the flax seed, though.  Add too much and you’ll end up with cherry/banana gelatin that is totally gross!  I also made a veggie stew in the crockpot that’s good for a meal each day.  Just lots of veggies – cabbage, carrots, onion, green pepper, celery, tomatoes in a vegetable broth with 2 cans of beans.  Third meal is a huge salad with mixed greens, green pepper, cucumber, sliced strawberries, avocado and crushed cashews.  No dressing required.  Snacks include an apple or orange and some cashew/pumpkin seed clusters.  It’s about 1200 calories per day.  Sometimes less because I’m truly not hungry.

 

So stick with me to see how this all works out.  I’m guessing if I keep this up I should reach my goal weight in about a month.  Not sure what happens then.  I want to continue to eat this way – I guess my body will decide to stop losing when it’s at its happy weight. 

Halfway there

I was supposed to peak at 40.

I was going to:
Weigh 120 lbs
Do a back walkover
Grow out my hair
Get promoted
Go on a girls’ trip
Teach ballet

I turn 40 tomorrow and here’s the deal:
I weigh 140 lbs
I can do a cartwheel and a round-off with straight legs and pointed feet
I have lots of muscles
I fit into all of my size 8’s and some of my size 6’s
I haven’t had a cigarette since 2009
I have long hair
I got a raise
I ate red meat maybe twice in the last year
I cut out all artificial sweeteners
I can surf
I have been walking/jogging 4x per week since September
I joined the Y and have been going
I take a ballet class 3x a month and smile the entire time I’m dancing
I sing loudly to the radio often
My family loves me more than anything
I get to go on dates with my husband often
I have a sincere affection for the people I work with
I have old and new friends that I love, trust and can depend on

I haven’t peaked
I’ve decided this is actually a good thing
Once you hit the peak, there’s nowhere to go but down
So I’ve decided to peak at 80
I’m only halfway there! I’ve got lots of improving to do


Do I wish I weighed less, was prettier, had a flatter stomach, and looked better in skinny jeans?
Of course I do!
Do I wish I had more friends, more love, more money, and more fun? Absolutely!
Do I wish I had no regrets, no grudges, no vices, and no skeletons? Sure.
Do I wish I had more willpower, more energy, more flexibility, and more courage? You bet I do!
But that wouldn’t be my life.

I need to sit back and appreciate all that I am and all that I have TODAY. I have my health, my family, my friends, my job and lots of other things in my life that I love. And hopefully, I’ll have 40 MORE years to work toward my goals, or BETTER YET, I’ll discover different goals and strive to reach them instead!

Happy Birthday to ME!

Another near miss and my nerves are shot

I wrote this back in November, but never posted.  It's a bit dated, but pretty important to me:

So if any of you have been following this blog since the beginning, you will remember a little post I did a few years back about a health scare I had on my 37th birthday regarding an abnormal brain MRI.   Everything turned out to be fine, but it was certainly a scary few days.

Here is my breast cancer scare post:

Mid September I found a lump.  I had one back in 1998.  Left breast.  Had it removed it was nothing.  No mammogram, no ultrasound, no waiting around for results, etc. 18 months ago I was getting painful lumps under my left arm. They came and went each month.  I got them checked out.  Mammogram and ultrasound found nothing.  Surgeon was sure they were nothing and said if they get worse to let her know.  They went away several months later and never came back,  So this new lump, whom I've named Floyd, made himself apparent to me once day while I was stretching out my chest muscle after a workout.  A very small nodule the size of a peanut M&M.  I didn't really think anything of it.  I had my husband feel it, just to see if he could.   I decided to have it checked out by my primary physician.  I was really expecting the same sort of scenario as 1998 or 2011.  Either it was nothing or I know exactly what it is - it's benign and let 's just take it out.  So when I spent 3+ hours having a mammogram and ultrasound, getting called back and forth from the exam room to the waiting room, I had a bad feeling.  The radiologist confirmed that it was solid and would need to be biopsied.  The time span between the first doctor's appointment and my biopsy was just 5 days.  The sense of urgency from everyone was concerning.  So was the fact that unlike my previous encounters with lumps, no one was saying, "I really think this is nothing."  And to make matters worse, I got a hold of my radiology report.  While it's great to have all this information, it's best not to get a hold of your radiology report until AFTER you have biopsy results.  I googled every word on that report and every numerical classification and STRESSED over every word.  The 7 day period of time between the biopsy and my "results" appointment is just inhumane.  Insomnia, irritability, diarrhea - you name it.  It was a terrible week.  Nothing compared to what a woman facing breast cancer has to endure, but crappy nonetheless.

My breast biopsy results were negative and I have a benign breast mass.  I had surgery mid-November to have the whole  lump removed, and then some.  Now the bills are streaming in.  My insurance SUCKS.  While I was due for a mammogram last April and didn't get one, the one I got last month was not considered preventive since there was a lump, and therefore not covered - all because of one stupid diagnosis code.  Ridiculous!   I am so lucky that at least I can afford all this garbage.  I can't imagine what people go through that don't have the means, or who end up being truly sick.  I want to shout out to a colleague of mine at work who is a 9-year breast cancer survivor.  I reached out to her earlier this week when I was convinced I had cancer.  She was so gracious and giving of her experience and information.  She calmed me down and was honest with me about her experience.  She offered me her contact info to call her at ANY time and gave me the names of her awesome doctors.  She checked up on me even while away on business. I can't thank her enough, and I only hope that she had an equally generous mentor to go to when she was waiting for her results.  Everyone should be so lucky to have her on their side.  Thank you Sheila!

So despite some funky scar tissue, I'm totally fine.  Things could have been so much worse, and I am thankful this was all just nothing.  I doubt any future mammograms will be uneventful, and I'm sure I'll always panic each year at the dr's office.  But I'm riding the wave for now and enjoying my health.

A Day in the Life . . .

So here’s what I’m eating.

BREAKFAST
¼ C Fiber One Cereal
1T whole oats
1T flax seed meal
½ C Almond Milk
½ banana - sliced
2 lg strawberries - sliced
2 whole walnuts - crushed

This breakfast is a constant. You can add some variety each day with different fruits, but this is a really great meal and shouldn’t be messed with. Breakfast should be filling. Don’t be afraid to add more of anything above if you’re not feeling satisfied. The flax seed takes a little getting used to, but if you get the ground meal variety, it’s almost like a powder and adds a little nutty flavor to your cereal. It’s important to include flax seed to ensure you’re getting good omega-3 fatty acids and plenty of fiber. Don’t fear the fiber. A few days on this breakfast and you will be able to set your watch to your “regularity” if you know what I mean. Don’t be afraid to pile on the fruit, too. This meal should come in around 350-400 calories and give you enough energy to start the day.

LUNCH
Whole wheat tortilla
2C salad greens
1T vinaigrette dressing or hummus or avocado slices
¼ C Black beans
¼ C peas
¼ C sunflower seeds
Any other veggies/beans of your choice – tomatoes, cucumbers
A piece of fruit – apple, orange, nectarine, kiwi, etc.

Beware of the tortilla. Some wraps can be 350 calories!! Try to stick with wraps that are no more than 150 calories. You’ll want to spend the other 250 calories of this meal dressing up the tortilla. I have access to a great salad bar for lunch during the week, so I can choose a variety of greens and veggies to go into my lunch wrap. The key to the wrap tasting good is the dressing/hummus/avocado that goes into it. These are all healthy oils/fats and should taste good to you. I am obsessed with black bean hummus, and will use that as a condiment any chance I get. You won’t miss the mayo, I promise! Just stay away from any “creamy” dressings as they most likely contain dairy. When I get back to my desk, I lay out the tortilla, put everything out on top, and just wrap it up. Some days, the cafeteria will offer a stir fry-type meal, I will sometimes opt for that instead of a salad with veggies, tofu and brown rice.

For those of you on the go (and who live on the east coast) – Wawa now makes veggie subs to order. I go with the whole wheat shorti with avocado spread, cucumbers, spinach, tomato and onions – no cheese. They also have a decent pre-made roasted red pepper hummus with pita slices that comes in around 300 calories that makes for a decent lunch alongside a piece of fruit if you’re in a pinch.

DINNER
Pre-made 6” pizza crust
1 small squash / sliced
¼ C sliced mushrooms
Any other veggies/beans of your choice – tomatoes, cucumbers

This is my vegan pizza dinner. Add to this whatever you like. I’ll add sliced tofu, maybe substitute hummus for pasta sauce. You can also add a soy-based cheese product if you need to have a pizza with “cheese”, but I’ve found that it doesn’t add much to the flavor and it’s not worth the calories. Plus it’s got to be processed, and I try to limit the amount of processed foods I eat. And since I don’t make my own bread, nor do I intent do, breads, wraps and pizza crusts are the bulk of my processed foods.

SNACKS
3C air popped popcorn
apple
¼ C almonds
Unlimited amts of plain vegetables

Snacks are a must. I have a snack in between meals and one after dinner. I try to limit my snack calories to about 300-400 per day. The popcorn is great. This is usually my post-dinner snack. You can really feel like you’re stuffing your face and it’s only about 100 calories. And 3 C popped is a huge bowl. Kirkland (Costco) makes these cashew clusters with almonds and pumpkin seeds that are divine. Sweet and savory at about 150 calories per serving – tastes like a treat! I also like Planter’s Energy Mix packets that have sesame sticks and nuts for about 130 calories per serving – again very “treat”- like.

So if I follow this plan above perfectly, I’m eating around 1200 calories in a day. And I will lose weight – even if I’m not exercising. But let’s be honest – I don’t follow this perfectly every day. I’m human, I have kids and a husband who don’t follow this way of eating and I slip constantly. I’ll have a taste of that cupcake, or a bite of pizza. It happens. There are days when I workout and really need more calories, so I’ll listen to my body and adjust accordingly. But if I at least PLAN to eat well each day, and I get some exercise, and I follow this MOST OF THE TIME – I’m good. Bottom line is, I’ve cut animal products from my diet and I’m maintaining my health – and all the numbers prove it!

Next post . . .Grocery store shopping and eating out.

This way to Veganville

Clearly some time has passed since my last entry. I'd like to share my journey following a vegan diet and the foibles and follies that have ensued since the New Year.

It all started in the beginning of January. While traveling for work, I met up with a friend who was telling me about this documentary about animal products and how bad they are for us. This, over a dinner in a Chicago steakhouse!! We shared oysters, a salad and plenty of wine. (Thank God wine is vegan!) I decided to cheek out the film and see for myself what all the fuss was about. In the meantime, I tried to go the next few days without eating any animal products. The meat part is really obvious and easy - no chicken, no burgers, no steak. The hard part is detecting the dairy and egg since it's in almost everything we eat. That's what separates the vegans from the vegetarians. Vegans don't eat ANYTHING that comes from an animal. If you subscribe to the idea that animal proteins are no good for you, then you have to also eliminate milk, yogurts, cheese and eggs from your diet.  Many vegetarians do eat dairy and eggs, and I've found that most "vegetarian" dishes contain these ingredients. So, I watched the documentary "Forks over Knives" and then watched a few more including "Earthlings" and "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead". They all presented compelling cases to suggest that eating animal products and processed foods are bad for you, and bad for the planet, too. I was game.

Instead of trying to fit all this into 1 entry, I will try to post several times each week to get you all up to speed on how it's been going, what I'm eating, what recipes I love, and what I'm ordering at restaurants. I'm putting more effort that I have in a long time to keep my fitness and weight loss goals on track. Bottom line is this: I've been maintaining a vegan diet about 95% of the time. I say 95% because there have been some slices of pizza in a pinch, shellfish at restaurants when another salad just won't do, and the random ice cream cone here and there - I do have kids and it's not like it's against my religion or anything. I have not had ANY meat since January (minus the Wawa Italian shorti I had back in late Jan - a weak moment). I have managed to lose about 10 pounds with limited exercise - which I need to start getting into) and I'm proud to say I've been rockin' a bikini at the pool and looking pretty good. I'm down to a size 4 and am just about 13 pounds away from my former ballerina body!! I have lowered my cholesterol by 40 "points". I know they aren't' points, but I have no idea what the unit of measure is for that. I'm sure one of you smart readers will be more than happy to inform me what the proper unit is. My LDL is down and my HDL is up - or whichever is bad is down, and the other one that is good is up - again, smart people, feel free to chime in here - I'm all for an education.  I have gotten my bloodwork checked out by my physician and so far I'm not nutrient deficient and I'm not starving myself. I have lots of energy and despite my recent funk, I did not get my typical January funk that, if you've been reading long enough, you know puts a handful of pounds back on me each winter. So all is good and I hope that blogging a bit more about how I've done all this will keep me motivated to increase my activity level and continue with this lifestyle I have found that really works for me.

Next post - A typical day eating like a Vegan. . .